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Writings

Why
Lover in the Darkness
Do you want to live forever?
My Hearts blood
Lonesome


Why?

I sit alone in the cold damp darkness of the night Demons dancing in my head and my heart is impaled with a wounded so deep inside I am asking myself will I ever see the light? Memories of you fill my mind, tears stream down my face, telling myself how I tried I pull my coat around me tighter now, and I ask myself how can this world be right? How could you do this to me? You promise you would never leave my side! Looking up to the Heavens, I scream and break the silence of the night Why did you do it and hurt me so? Why did you leave my side? -  by Zenn - 1998

Lover in the Darkness

Laying in bed, my body covered in sweat, and my mind is dizzy with lust for you. I feel you, I crave you, I want you, can you hear me? You overwhelm my senses and I feel your power. Your body lays over me now, I wrap my legs high and tightly around your waist, not wish to let you go. Oh "yes" I cry out to you, I am begging you, please give me what I yearn for and feed my desire. I feel your hands on my face, gently caressing me now, I hear you whisper to me, "Hush and be still," and I obey. "Soon I will give you all that you desire and even more." I smile at him, looking deep into his glowing light blue eyes, I feel a sharp stab in my neck and sheer Ecstasy, then I plunge into darkness and into a deep sleep. I wake the next morning and feeling sore on my neck. I get up and walk over to the mirror and I see on my neck a small bit of blood with two small marks. Then a quick flash in my mind of you kissing me in the darkness of the night.  -  by Zenn - 1998

Do you want to live forever?

He stands behind me, I feel his body pressed up against mine, feeling his breath on my neck. I hear his voice whisper in my ear. "Do you want to live for forever, my love? I turn around to face him, I look him in the eyes, oh his eyes, so brilliantly blue, I answer, "Yes". He tells me, "Never will your life be the same, you will live in the darkness of the night, you will love me forever, I will be your Master, you will be my slave, this shall be the your fate. He asked me again, "Do you still wish to live forever? I answer him, looking into his eyes;" Yes."

His arms holding me, strong, but gently, I feel his lips gently kissing my neck, oh god, I feel the chills running down my spine, I throw my head back to let him enjoy more of my skin, my neck, my breasts, giving my body to him. His kisses gently moving down my body, oh I want him. He moves back up to my neck, his tongue dancing on my skin, I feel the coolness of his breath, he whispers in my ear, "forever love." I feel the sharp sting of his teeth, ripping into my flesh, my body aching in pain, I feel my blood trickling down my throat, down my breast.

I struggle to be released from his grip, but I can not. I hear him speaking in my mind "do not be scared my love, remember you will live forever, fear not death. " The room is spinning, the coldness of the nights air against my skin, I feel him, I fear him, I love him, god I feel his heart beat.  Where is mine?   I "scream in terror" , but no words come from my mouth, I am frightened, my heart beat, is growing dimmer, slower, quieter, I open my eyes I see nothing but darkness. I feel him releasing his teeth from my neck.  I am numb, cold, limp, like a rag doll in his arms, "Oh god" I cry in my mind, what have I done?

I have met the devil in the full moon's light, " what have I done?" , and I hear him whisper to me, " No, not the devil, my love, not the devil, just your Master.

He pulls me close to his chest, his skin is so warm against the coolness of my body, I feel the wetness of something on my lips, it is warm, rich, thick, I hear him say, "drink, my love", and I sucked the fluid greedily , and I start to "hear" the sound of my heartbeat again, growing faster, stronger, I open my eyes; and I see I am sucking on a cut on his chest, drinking his blood, I look up at him and he smiles at me. Enough he says for now and pushes me away from him, oh god I ache for more,  and gazing up into his eyes pleading.

"No" he says, there will be more later, be patient my little one. He cradles the back of my head, and gently gives me a kiss, I taste "our" blood on my lips. I look around in the Darkness, and everything is glowing, wondrous, I can feel, hear everything around me, for I am mesmerized by my surroundings, and yet feeling so weak. He gently lifts me to the couch, and lays me down, and he smiles at me, and he whispers, "rest now love, for now you have eternal life, and you will be forever be mine." - by Zenn - 1996

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My Hearts Blood

I love you, three words that mean so little to so many. How can three words cover all four corners of the heart, vast reaches of the mind, and the infinite bounds of the human soul itself. The love that binds two people and makes them one. An unseen force that carries beyond the physical love, to great happiness at a look, a smile and understanding. Are two who truly love ever really apart?

I believe I loved you (or I know I carried my my love for you) from the day I was born, I needed only to find you, for it to emerge. Why else had my friends said, I seemed so in love talking about you. When others speak of love, when just meeting and how marriage is so wonderful. At first we argued, cajoled, insulted and suffered more then any. Most would have turn away from each other, like builders working, correcting the foundation of a home to the liking and strengthen it they want before the building even starts. We are these builders. Our love is a house that grows each day.

I do look at other women. I see you as the most beautiful in my eyes for I can see more than how you look to the eye, for your naked beauty is shown to me, and the life and soul of you. The struggle, pain and pleasure it took, to become who I find in my life is in your face and to be seen only by true eyes of love; mine are those eyes. Mine is the love that makes you whole yours is the love that keeps me together.

The physical love we share is a beauty in itself wrapped inside you, a love we share that makes sex the best. When in love it makes it so wonderful, to smell, feel, and hold you in your naked glory. Ourselves so exposed as to shed tears of gold that wet my face, and to feel you shudder so under me is the deepest emotion I have ever felt.

I wish to place my hand upon your face and draw it close to mine and press our lips together and slide my arms around you, press your body close to mine and give you a kiss of love. A hug so tight to know the distance between us is gone and my love is in my arms again.

Yes "I love you" seems like empty words compared to the range and depth with which in lies my true feelings. My hearts blood is yours and it flows in all parts of my body. My mind and thoughts are yours. My soul waits beyond this frail life to travel forever together with you.

I love you - T.M.R. 1983

Lonesome

I was alone. I didn't mind. There was always me. Then there was you. We were together. Now I am gone. We are a part. I am alone. Now alone hurts. I never knew lonesome. Until I knew you

T.M.R. 1983

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